My Grinch-y Heart

Right now I'm here...

I'm in kind of a funk about the month of December. I don't know if it's because Thanksgiving was so late this year, but I just feel like Christmas is going to be here and gone before I've had time to properly enjoy it! I think some of this stems from how I feel about Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. There's the food, of course, but it's really one of the only holidays we have that I feel like has very few cultural pressures. It's not religious, there are no gifts involved, it doesn't revolve around showing appropriate amounts of patriotism...it's just meant to be a time to gather and eat and just be. But anymore it feels like Thanksgiving is just supposed to be a prelude to Christmas. It's like the Christmas season starts the day after Halloween now and that just makes me grumpy. I see all of these people on social media who have put up their trees and Christmas lights by the end of the first week of November, quickly followed by a mid-November onslaught of bloggers posting gift guides. I start to feel stressed that now I'm somehow "behind" on Christmas, as though it's some sort of race.

On top of all of this is the fact that we will be travelling 2 out of the 3 weekends in December before Christmas. One of those weekends is to celebrate Christmas with M's family and another one of the weekends is going to NYC (more on that later). So it's not as though we're going to be out of town not doing fun, Christmas-y things. It's just that I realized when we got home from Thanksgiving that this weekend is pretty much my one shot at decorating the house and doing another marathon cookie baking session like I did last year.

M and I typically just exchange stockings, but our trip to NYC is our gift to each other this year. We celebrated Christmas with my family the night before Thanksgiving (complete with Christmas tree and falling snow!) and most of the gifts we're giving M's family are quite small in size, so there won't be any pretty wrapped gifts under the tree.

I'm also feeling a bit gloomy about the fact our holiday time with my family has already come and passed. We absolutely LOVE living in Vermont, but man, it's hard to be so far away from our families. We have our trip to Baltimore to look forward to seeing more of M's family (can't wait to get my hands on my little niece and nephew again!), but I don't know when I'll see my parents and sister again, which makes me incredibly sad, especially at this time of year.

Also we do not have a cute picture for our Christmas cards, which means I haven't ordered our cards yet, which is causing me an embarrassing amount of stress.

So yeah...feeling kind of blah in general. I'm hoping a weekend of cookie baking and wreath making and tree decorating will bring me to this:

Five on Friday: Thanksgiving

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Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday and I am so looking forward to celebrating with my family next week and getting to meet our new niece and nephew. I haven't been home since March and I know this is going to be an extra emotional visit for us because it will be the last holiday we celebrate in the house I grew up in. (I got kind of weepy just typing that out.) And since we won't be spending Christmas with my family, we're having a little family Christmas celebration the night before Thanksgiving. My mom even bought a fake tree so that we can help decorate :)

1. Isn't this the most stunning Thanksgiving centerpiece you've ever seen? I would be tempted to add in a few pheasant feathers, but wow. I can't stop looking at it. And it looks like it would be pretty easy to assemble, which is a bonus because I do not have a gift for floral arrangements.

2. When we do Thanksgiving with my family, the libations menu typically consists of beer, wine, and maybe a batch of our wedding cocktails (which, admittedly are the perfect festive fall beverage). The Kitchn posted this recipe for a pitcher of Amber Rush cocktails last week and it just looks so fun! I love the way the star anise looks floating in the pitcher and the combination of rye, citrus, and spiced honey syrup (with the suggested addition of a little ginger beer) sounds pretty spot on.

3. As a rule, I don't think the Thanksgiving menu should be messed with. This meal is not the time to trot out newfangled recipes. It is all about the humble classics. With that said, I am making something a little bit different for dessert this year. There will still be pumpkin and apple pies (duh) and I got my pecan pie fix at our Worksgiving celebration yesterday (pictured above), but I'm trying out a recipe for Buche de Thanksgiving. I typically make a Buche de Noel log for Christmas every year and when I saw this recipe in my 'Cold Weather Cooking' cookbook, I knew I had to try it. Pumpkin cake + cream cheese and toffee filling? Hello, yes please! I'll be sure to snap some pictures and if it's any good, I'll share the recipe. (I've looked everywhere online for it with no luck.)

 

4. I am in love with the idea of hosting Thanksgiving one day. It's one of those things that I dreamed of as a little girl (is that weird?) and I feel like I still won't really be a grown-up until I've hosted a Thanksgiving of my very own. While our current situation doesn't make that likely to happen anytime soon, I can still dream. Right now those dreams pretty much take the form of setting the table (again, probably weird). I have a thing for china and serveware and my current dream table setting includes this pheasant gravy boat, the turkey platter that goes with my beloved Spode Woodland china, and these rustic glam servers.

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5. Stuffing or dressing? This is a hot debate in our house. I come from a family of people who are decidedly dressing only. My grandmama makes the most amazing dressing from old biscuits, rolls, and Saltine crackers. I cannot wait to dig in next week! M's family is dedicated to stuffing. (M does make an exception for oyster dressing.) I'm normally not very squirmish when it comes to food, but I am completely scared of and grossed out by stuffing and absolutely will not touch it. So what side of the aisle do you fall on?

Five on Friday

1. I know I already shared this on Instagram, but it's too great not to share here too. My mom works for Orvis and a few weeks ago they received the following email:

 

We are being visited this week by a friendly mallard duck, who has been greeting associates at the entrance all morning.

 

A wild bird expert I contacted told me he is fine, has recently molted (lost his flying feathers) and is probably seeking a quiet place to hang out away  from the pond while his feathers grow back.  He is harmless and will probably waddle away when he gets hungry or thirsty.

 

The bird expert I spoke with said we should not feed the duck.  Not only are the foods we have here not particularly good for the duck…if we feed him, he might get confused and decide this is a good place for him to stay. 

 

That said, please don’t feed the duck, watch your step around the entrance to the building, and be extra careful driving in the HR parking lot.  We don’t want to hurt or confuse our duck friend as he resolves his own unique and personal issues!

 

On Wednesday, I received the following text from my mother:

Apparently he also now quacks when greeted. I know they are still working with the wildlife expert to make sure their little friend is A-OK, but I can't help but anthropomorphize here and think the little guy looks like he would like to come inside and join the folks in Finance. I'm quite jealous; I really wish we had an office duck at my workplace!

 

 

2. Forget everything I said about not being into dressing up for Halloween. Next year I'm going as Ina. Now I just need to convince M to go as a bottle of "good" vanilla or olive oil or Jeffrey. (Thanks to Food & Femininity for the inspiration!)

 

3. I love, love, LOVE the idea of giving this necklace to a new mama or a recently married friend. I happen to have some engaged friends and some pregnant friends, so ladies, please act surprised when you receive this from me :) M, this would make a wonderful gift for your wife (hint, hint, wink, wink).

 

4. I'm an aunt! My sister-in-law gave birth to the most beautiful twins early yesterday morning. I am counting down the days until I get to meet my adorable niece and nephew!!!!!

 

5. Truth. 

 

 

 

 

 

Updates

Hola! It's been awhile since I checked in.  Things are absolutely bonkers around here right now.  Today begins my last day of work at my current job. Which is mild-moderately terrifying since I'm still searching for employment in Vermont. {If you have any connections in Burlington, feel free to send them my way.}  One week from today I will be waking up in a different state where we LIVE. Crazy talk.

We have lined up two places to live. Because we really love drama, we are moving into a temporary home on July 1 and then again on August 15 into our permanent residence. Which means for 6 weeks, we'll be living out of like 3 boxes. Very exciting. I love our permanent place...at least, what I've seen of it in pictures since I haven't actually been.  It looks like the neighborhood and location will be a great fit for us and it's a similar layout to our current house.  Now if we can just find someone to rent our current place so we can get out of our lease...

I've been such an emotional basketcase the past few weeks that I'm wondering if this is what pregnancy hormones will be like.  I'm all over the place. Really hyperactive and happy and packing and dreaming of nesting one minute, overwhelmed, stressed, and crying hysterically the next.  Last Monday I have a cry session the likes of which haven't been seen since my toddler days. And I'm an ugly crier. No bueno.  I really am tickled to bits about our move, but heaven forbid I mention that there's anything I'm stressed/scared/worried about and everyone I know is like, "But you wanted this!"  Yes...yes, I did. And I'm thrilled that it's happening. And I know it's all going to be worth it in the end. But just because we pursued this doesn't make a 600-mile move in 3 weeks any less stressful.  So please everyone...just let me have my pity party cake and cry over it too.  K?

Mainly I'm just getting emotional at leaving Virginia. I have never left. Ever. All of my life is here. My family has been here for generations. We're talking back to George Washington's time. Virginia is in my blood.  I grew up here, I've experienced all of my joys and losses here.  All of my firsts and lasts have been here. I graduated from high school and college here. I had my first "grown-up" apartment here and I adopted both of my sweet dogs here. I met, fell in love with, and married my husband here and we started our life together here.  My entire being, who I am and everything that has shaped me, is inextricably linked to Virginia. I know we'll be back. And it's not as though we're moving that far away; we're in the same timezone and just a quick flight home.  And I have never thought of myself as someone who was afraid to be far some home. I'm still not afraid...I'm just sad. I feel like I'm leaving a large part of myself behind.  It truly is the closing of a chapter of my life, in a way that feels more tangible and permanent and defined than any other chapters.

But with all of that said, I can't wait. We are so excited to just go somewhere as us and, in a way, start our life together all over again.  Away from where we grew up and met and had all of these experiences. It's a chance to redefine our marriage, our careers, and ourselves. What an adventure that will be.  

I don't plan to post again until we've made the move. I want to enjoy every last second in Virginia and then there's that business of never-ending packing.  Enjoy your week and see you in Vermont!

Third Time's A Charm

Yes, that's right, we're moving again! For the third time since our engagement. {The fourth time if you count the fact that we moved in together 2 weeks before M proposed.}

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I haven't made it much of a secret that we've been pretty unhappy with our living situation for the past 2 years. We knew that if an opportunity presented itself this summer, we had to jump on it and go. As it happens, just such an opportunity presented itself a few days ago in the form of an incredible job offer for M.  So in a little less than 4 weeks, we'll be driving our dogs and all of our worldly possessions to Vermont.  I'm becoming a Yankee!  After our somewhat nomadic lifestyle over the past couple of years {4 moves in 2.5 years}, we are looking forward to putting down roots in New England.

I am a bundle of nerves right now. I'm excited and scared and stressed and happy and stressed and nervous and stressed.  Did I mention stressed? Coordinating a 600-mile move on 3 weeks' notice to a place I've never set foot in is causing me to consume a lot of Tums. It will absolutely all be worth it and we're lucky to have friends and family connections in the area, but woof. Throw in the 100+ pounds of neurotic coonhounds who will be moving with us and I am a bonafide mess.

Things I Am Excited About:
*Christmas in Vermont {Hello..."White Christmas" is only one of my all-time FAVORITE movies.}
*Fall in Vermont. Duh.
*Summer in Vermont. Goodbye Southern heat and humidity. Won't miss you at all.  Except in months November-May.
*Proximity to Canada. No, seriously. I have never been. And we will be 90 minutes from Montreal. So basically 90 minutes from France Lite. Just go with it.
*Proximity to Boston. 3 hours from many dear friends and one of my favorite cities. Yay!
*Proximity to seriously amazing skiing. Can't wait to hit the slopes.
*J. Crew, Trader Joe's, Williams-Sonoma, and TONS of adorable little locally-owned shops and restaurants. {I realize I've probably just committed a major Vermont sin by listing large corporations as a reason I'm excited to move there.}
*Being the most conservative person in political conversations for once.
*Finally justification for my obsession with coats.
*Living in a fun city with lots to do and lots of people our age. I am going to go on a friend binge. I can't wait.
*ALL THE CHEESE.

Things I Am Nervous About:
*I have never lived outside of the state of Virginia, let alone outside of the South.
*I have never lived more than 3 hours away from my parents.
*Winter in Vermont. I am terrified.
*Our heating bill. See above.
*Lack of Duke's mayonnaise.
*Lack of "y'all" in the vocabulary.
*Moving somewhere I have never been and renting a house I have never seen. All the makings of a potential disaster, or at the very least, an interesting living situation for the next year.
*Finding gainful employment. Vermont has a rather small economy and people hold on to full-time jobs with both hands.
*Money. As if I wasn't already nervous about that, we're moving to a place with a higher cost of living.
*ALL THE CHEESE. {I don't do moderation very well.}

The positives far outweigh the negatives and we are both over-the-moon excited. I've promised the dogs that Mummy will buy them some snow boots and jackets and they're not so sure about the whole thing, but I promised them there would also be dog treats, so they're on board. This will be an exciting adventure for us and a place to start over after a challenging couple of years.

Native New Englanders, any advice on what cold-weather gear I should start stockpiling now?

Road Trip Diet Busters

road trip tunes

Last weekend we packed up the whip {again} and headed off to North Carolina {again} for a long weekend at Topsail Island with my parents and my sister.

We're big on squeezing every last minute of fun out of any trip, even one as short as this one, so we elected to make a stop at Wilber's Barbecue in Goldsboro on the way to the beach.

 One thing you should know about us: we are really into BBQ. And I mean real BBQ. M doesn't really discriminate, but I am strictly a Carolina BBQ girl. I prefer Eastern-style, but I'll settle for Lexington-style or South Carolina if need be.  And Wilbur's is the gold standard for Eastern.

The food was, of course, AMAAAZING, but the real gem was spotting this guy...

In case you can't tell from the blurry picture, his shirt says, "Gas costs so much I can't afford to fart."

We were at the beach for exactly 48 hours, which was enough time to read both of these...

To get my mom hopelessly addicted to Candy Crush...

 To drink plenty of these...

And to enjoy this absolutely beautiful view...

We continued the tour o' delicious with a pilgrimage to Bojangles on the drive home.

Bojangles is strictly a Southern thing.  So Southern, in fact, that it {wisely} does not darken the doorstep of our locale waaaaay up in northern Virginia. So when we see a Bojangles, we pull over.  There were cajun filet sandwiches and seasoned fries had by all.  The only thing preventing Bojangles from achieving fast food nirvana is the fact that they carry Pepsi products. Disgusting. We are Coke people.

Needless to say, we arrived home late Monday night, exhausted and full of sodium,  but happy and relaxed.

How was your Memorial Day weekend?

Nothing Could Be Finer Than To Be In Carolina...

...with my faaaaaaamily.

Last weekend we packed up the whip and headed south to one of my favorite cities, Asheville, NC, to see my little sister graduate from college!

My sister and I are about as polar opposite in personal style as one can imagine. Whereas I prefer to keep my inner granola-crunchy hippie carefully hidden up my preppy-yuppy sleeve, she has it tatooed for the world to see.

Literally.

So while she may have started her college career at our mama's uber-preptastic alma mater, University of Richmond, she graduated from a much more her-appropriate school: Warren Wilson College.

Warren Wilson claims to fame: James Franco {although after this fiasco they prefer not to claim him} and Bill Pullman's kids.  True story: Bill {we're on a first name basis} stays at the same B&B as my 'rents when they're all visiting their kids. My dad and Bill talked local history for ages over breakfast one morning, and my dad had absolutely no clue who he was talking to.  I would've wanted to know what it was like to work with Devon Sawa {my ultimate 90's-girl crush}.

Anyhoo.

We took a little tour of campus and my favorite part was the field where the sheep are. I love sheep. They are a big part of my bucolic dream life. Some day...

I only took two pictures during the weekend {I discovered Candy Crush and spent most of time trying to get the hell out of Lemonade Lake}.  M and I took my sister and her friend {below} to dinner at Curate to celebrate while my parents stayed at the house with the grandparents.

If you're going to be in the Asheville area anytime soon, you MUST make reservations at Curate.  If I had stopped to take pictures of each course, I wouldn't have been able to eat anything. We scarfed down everything the second it landed on the table.  Our favorites:

patatas bravas {basically home fries with a spicy sauce. These were M's favorite.}

the berejenas la taberna {fried eggplant drizzled with honey and rosemary. My favorite.}

chistorra and chips jose's way {chorizo wrapped in potato chips and deep fried}

espuma de chocolate {it tasted like warm brownie batter + hazelnut praline and raspberry sorbet}

We were in Asheville for less than 48 hours but that was long enough for me to drink a 12-pack of my beloved Diet Cheerwine...

one for the drive home!

photo credits: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5

Friday Favorites

It's been so long since I did a Friday Favorites post! I hope to be back to regular posting soon. Here's what's on my radar this week:

So I have an addiction.  It's strange, because I really hate the regular Peeps. I get grossed out just thinking about them.  But these...these are amazing. True story: I drove to three stores earlier this week looking for them so I could have one on my lunch break. NO SHAME.

I spend a fortune each week on grocery store basil and cilantro.  I'm determined to overcome my black thumb this summer and grow them at home.  I bought seeds and little starter indoor growing cups at Target this week and I'm going to plant them this weekend.  This article has some good tips on successfully growing basil and this one is all about cilantro; do you have any other tips for me? I'm going to need all the help I can get. I am a plant murderer.

So you can get the top dress from the normal J.Crew website for $88, or you can get the bottom dress from the J.Crew Factory website for $54.50 plus another 30% off with the code MOREPLEASE.  No brainer. 

Recipe is from the 1995 Southern Living Annual Recipes cookbook

My parents are coming to visit this weekend and I'm so excited to tackle another item on my 101 in 1,001 list with my mom: making homemade bread! My mother had a sourdough starter that lasted for years and we always had homemade sourdough bread growing up.  She recently gave my sister and I the ingredients to make our own starters and this weekend is the moment of truth! My starter's been going for a couple of weeks. I'll report back next week, along with my mom's tips and tricks for theeeee best homemade bread.

For my DC/Baltimore/Northern VA friends and readers, Livingsocial has a fabulous deal going on a 4-pack of tickets to the Virginia Gold Cup races.  M and I got our package and would love to see lots of fun people there on the North Rail! Hop to it and let me know if you'll be there!

Happy Easter weekend!

Happy Birthday!

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Wishing my wonderful, cheesecake-loving husband a very happy birthday today!  I can't wait to celebrate with a decadent homemade dinner and a weekend spent at home together.  M, I am so lucky to have you as my husband and my best friend.  Thanks for being you.

So 2012 Wasn't Awesome...

I'm not quite sure where to begin this post, so I'll just dive right in.  I don't typically do year-in-review posts, and this post certainly doesn't follow the model of most of those posts.  But I've been meaning to do a post looking back on our first year of marriage and in talking with my parents last week, I realized that reflecting on our first year of marriage is essentially the same as reflecting on 2012.  And 2012 was not a good one.

Not because of our relationship, but because of so many external factors that weighed us down.  We kicked off 2012 in Atlanta.  The flight home was miserable, because we were leaving a city we love and time with sweet friends and headed back to a condo we hated, in a city we hated, to job situations that were less than ideal.  It's hard for me to put into words the absolute funk that we spent the first half of 2012 in.  I think most days we were just going through the motions.  Numb might be the right word. Throw in the fact that work stress caused some {fortunately temporary} serious health issues for M, and we were about at our breaking point come spring.

At that point, we realized that things weren't going to miraculously get better.  We realized that we needed a change and stat.  So I began looking for a new job, and was fortunate enough to find one relatively quickly.  And I love my new job. LOVE. Wonderful people, wonderful work environment, doing something I'm passionate about.  M and I were discussing what our favorite memory of 2012 was and we both agreed it was the night we celebrated my new job at VOLT.  I think it was the first night in a long time when we both felt hopeful and happy and excited.

But just about the time I started my new job and got that part of my life together, the other wheels fell off.  We adopted our sweet boy, Ozzie.  And as much of a joy as he is to us now, the first 2 months were absolute hell.  He cost us so much money and time.  He caused many tears and fights.  With the help of a wonderful vet, our absurdly stubborn personalities, and a lot of patience, we are at a good place with our sweet boys.

But just about the time we started to figure things out with Ozzie, I had to go and blow the engine in my car.  Which, 3 months later, is an issue we are still dealing with and paying for.  Going from having only a year of payments left on a car to having to put in a new engine AND a new transmission is not a fun experience. Especially when you and your spouse both work for non-profits, which translates to not a lot of extra cash lying around to take care of these things.  We truly would not have made it through this fall without our parents.  They have showed us that you are never too old to need your mom and dad! We are so grateful to them.

Did I mention that in the midst of starting the new job and adopting the new dog we moved 20 miles south?  And went to five weddings? Three of which M was a groomsman in?  We were a bit busy this year.

We have made some definite improvement in the past year.  I am in a job that makes me happy.  We live in a townhouse with lots of space and potential, a big kitchen, and a fenced-in yard for our boys.  M has a new car for the first time since he was 16.  We are making progress on paying down debt.  2013 kicks off in a much better position than 2012.

But we still have a ways to go for 2013.  As much as we love our actual physical residence, we still don't like where we live.  We have no friends with no chance to meet new friends and nothing to do.  That is the reality of the tiny place we moved to so that my commute would be manageable.  We feel like we are watching our childless years blow by us, unable to do the things we want to do in this supposedly carefree time.  That's got to change.  I need gal pals.  M needs male friends.  We need couple friends so that I can fulfill my NEED to entertain.

It's impossible for me to separate my thoughts on the first year of marriage from my thoughts on 2012 because they are one and the same.  Marriage is hard.  That shouldn't be a shock to anyone.  The world threw so many obstacles at us this year that there were times when we truly struggled in our relationship.  But I married an incredible man who takes his vows as seriously as I take mine.  We absolutely meant the words we said to each other on our wedding day and we are in it for the long haul.  I don't think we expected to have so many of those vows tested so early on in our marriage, but I think we both feel that we can pretty much handle anything now.  There were times last year when I was so angry because we weren't getting that rose-colored hazy fog type of newlywed bliss that you hear about.  We got the real world and we got a hell of a lot of it.  But we also came out of it feeling fairly bulletproof, and for my money {what little of it is left after my car is finally fixed!}, I'll take bulletproof over schmaltz any day.

We've decided 2013 is going to be our year.  We may not be able to take all the trips we want this year or finally pull the trigger on buying a house, but we're going to make it an amazing year all the same.  Our little family of four plans to dominate the next 12 months in a big way.

Christmas Eve Traditions

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This is my first Christmas away from my family, and I'll admit, I'm a little misty-eyed at missing out on our family's traditions.  Growing up, every Christmas Eve was the same and I loved that.  We attend our church's Christmas Eve candlelight service and call for Chinese take-out as soon as we're in the parking lot.  As soon as we've stuffed ourselves silly with Moo Goo Gai Pan, Hot and Sour Soup, and egg rolls, we each get to open one present, usually pajamas.  When we were little, we would put on our new PJs and drive around town looking at Christmas lights.  As we got older, that turned into my sister and I parking it on the couch to watch our favorite, A Christmas Story.

I think Trish said it best: "As a matter of fact I like Christmas Eve the very best, because Christmas Day, while spectacular in so many ways, comes and goes so quickly, and Christmas Eve just has so much magical energy and excitement swirling around."

While I'm sad to be missing out on all of the excitement at my parents', I'm so excited to be a part of my husband's family Christmas and see what makes it special for them.  

Did you have any special Christmas Eve traditions growing up?  Have you started any new ones since moving out on your own, getting married, or having kids?